Face - de Face

                                  Anurag, Amaan and I (Ambarish) were very good and close friends. We were named as ‘A-Group’ by our classmates. All of us were good in nature and behaviour and also good at studies. But I was not so good at studies.

                                                Vimal, Vivek, Vicky and Vinod were of another group named as ‘V-Group’. This group was notorious for its activities. Vimal the most handsome guy of our school was serious in his study despite of all his ill-manners and mischief.

                                                Neha and Nafisa were two bosom friends and were known as the ‘N-Group’ among the boys of our class.

                                                All of us were in the same school for 7 years. Anurag always stood first in our class and then Neha followed by Vimal, Amaan and Nafisa. I was one of the most backward students. This was due to two reasons. First of all I had no zeal to waste my time for doing a work like studies and the other reason was I always used to listen to my walkman sitting on the last bench. My best friend Anurag was good at writing poems and most of the times he used to talk with us in poetic style. So being in his company even I learnt a bit of talking in poetic style.

                                                It was a warm Monday morning. I got up early and was getting ready for school. Before leaving for school I went through the astrology column in the newspaper as I strongly believe in astrology. After reading it I got a little excited as it was written as ‘Today may turn out to be your luckiest day. Certain events may surprise you. Think and decide before taking any decision’. I tried to think a little about what I read but was quite confused and so left for school. I took my seat in the back benches and found that I forgot my walkman in my house only. That day I had no option other than listening to those boring lectures. I thought of concentrating for sometime but soon felt as if my teacher’s lecture was in Greek and Latin language for me as I was not able to understand anything. Then suddenly I heard a beautiful voice saying “May I come in sir?” I wondered whose stunning voice is that and looked towards the door “Wowwwwwww………” was the only word I could tell. There was standing a girl who can be described as Paragon of beauty. My eyeballs were stuck to her ravishing FACE. Not even for a single moment I could turn my eyes away from her FACE. My heart started pumping faster. She was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen in my life. As days passed on I realised that she was one of the most intelligent girls as well and name of that charming girl was “NISHA!!!!!” She made Neha and Nafisa as her friends and became one member of ‘N-Group’. I never even missed a single chance of looking at her whenever I got a chance. I became a lovesick of Nisha but I never realised that because I used to think that it is just an attraction. But Nisha hated me like anything. But I dint know the reason behind that.

                                                Three years passed very soon and our final exam of 9th standard was over. The results were published showing the usual outcome. And I continued my poor record by securing only 33% of marks.

                                                Then we had 2 months of summer holidays. I was all excited for it. As days passed I realised that I was not at all enjoying those days. It became difficult for me to spend even a single day. I felt I was missing her a lot. That is when I realised how much I was in love with her. Every time she was in my mind. Then I decided to propose her immediately after school reopens.

                                                The summer vacation ended and we were in 10^th class. I, who got a chance to see my love, Nisha after a long period of two months, was out of control and wanted to express myself before her. I went to Nisha and told her in a poetic style

 “Nisha, meri baat sunona,

                             Mujhe tumhare bina nahin jina” and what was the reply??? She got so irritated and furious that without thinking anything

“Toh mar jaa naa(Then go and die). Kyun

mere pichhe pada hai? Agar dubara aise harkat ki, toh mein principal se tumhare baarein mein shikayat karungi”

             I interrupted by saying                                                               “But Nisha, I just LOVE you and wanted your reply”, “I just HATE you” she continued, “Can sun rise in the west? No. Can you secure a mere 2^nd division in the exams? No. Then can I LOVE you? No. Never”. That day I could easily understand the reason why she used to HATE me and also realised the seriousness in life. If I had been serious towards study, perhaps it could have made a difference. Then I decided to impress her by scoring good marks.

                                                          After three months from that day our pre-test examination started and was over very soon. After another month, the results were published and the outcome was as usual. But this time I got a 1^st division with 66% of marks.

After two days I went to Nisha and said

“Musquil tha mere liye yahan tak aana (To get a 1^st division)           

 Phir bhi chala aaya hoke tumahra diwana,

Result ke baarein mein tum se aur kya kehna

Aab toh maan jao Nisha”

Though she was not as furious as she was that day, still she replied “Get lost”. I was irritated at her reply and dint know what to do. I was helpless. I was wandering how to make her agree then an idea struck my mind. I decided not to go behind her like mad anymore but will make her come to me and decided to act as if I don’t want her anymore. I kept my fingers crossed hoping this trick works out. Anurag knew everything about my LOVE for Nisha. After hearing what Nisha replied, he tried to assure me. “Don’t lose hope. Wait for some more time and try hard to come first by securing more marks than Nisha because I know you have got that potential”. But he was shocked by my reply “Let her go her own way. I don’t like her and will never speak to her again”.

                                                Three months passed on and TEST examination was over. Everybody was surprised to know the results. It was a miracle for everyone because I topped the merit list, then Anurag followed by others. For Nisha it was unbelievable. She wanted to congratulate me and came near me. I was in canteen with Anurag and some other friends when suddenly I heard a voice “Ambarish Congrats”. But I dint listen to her, turned back and left that place. Anurag was shocked for this behaviour of mine because he thought I would readily accept her congratulations. Nisha felt guilty and started weeping. But Anurag tried to console her by telling “Please don’t cry, I’ll talk to Ambarish”

                                                Anurag came and requested me to forgive her for her past deeds and asked me if I want Nisha to say sorry to me. But I hate to listen the words ‘SORRY’ and ‘THANKS’ from people whom I like and I replied back in anger “I don’t want anything from her”. But after a long conversation I agreed with him to talk to Nisha. I was very excited as I was nearly successful with my plan but I was waiting to hear those golden words from her mouth.

                                                I and Anurag met her in school canteen. There was silence for some moment and none of us spoke anything. Anurag broke the silence. “Arey yaar yahan pe chup chap baithne thodi aaye the?? Thik hai tum dono baat karo hum kuch khane ke liye late hain.”  and he went. Immediately Nisha spoke “Ambarish Congrats”. I said “Thanks” then she continued “Actually I am sorry Ambarish, I always behaved rudely to you” She paused for a moment and continued “Ambarish……. I LOVE YOU”. Finally the moment came for which I was eagerly waiting from so many days. I was out of this world after listening it from Nisha’s mouth. From that day my life took a new path. We got closer to each other slowly as time passed on.

                                                After three months from that day, our ICSE board examinations had to begin. Two days before the exams we had to collect our admit cards from the school. Nisha had reached there before me and after collecting her admit card she enquired about me with Anurag. And he told her that I’ll be there in 5 minutes. After sometime I reached school and was on the other side of the road. And I saw Nisha coming out of our school gate. She saw me and started crossing the road. While crossing the busy road in a hurry, the admit card fell from her hand but by that time she was in the middle of the road. As she was trying to pick it up from the ground, a truck, running with a very high speed hit her and ran over her. Everybody gathered there. She was rushed to hospital bleeding profusely from head.

                                                All the doctors tried to rescue her but in vain. Despite their sincere efforts she couldn’t survive. I heard this news in the hospital and was terribly shocked. I was not in a condition to accept such a shock in my life. I was alive but my heart was dead. I was not able to speak anything because I couldn’t understand what was happening. I felt as if life has turned its back on me.

                                                The cadaver was sent for post mortem. And I saw that face, which was my life, for the last time. By the time I could think of returning home it was 7:30 in the evening. The whole day was full of sorrow and it was the worst day of my life. I was feeling damn weak.

                                                When I reached home, all of my family members were out for a party in the neighbour’s house. I sat on the verandah thinking about all those memories and the whole incident with tears in my eyes.

                                                The music of the party became louder and I could hear the song

          “Socha nahin tha takdeer yahan layegi

                             Manjil pe aate hi jaan chali jayegi” of the movie KAANTE. That time I could find the reality of life and could imagine how sorrowful life is. I don’t know when I fell asleep thinking about the incident. But that FACE and memories were the only thing I was left with for the rest of my life. And lastly I realised ‘Birth is ephemeral and Death is perpetual ’. 

A Dream Come True

It was a fine sunny morning which happened to be the first day of my school life. I set out with my father to my first school which was entitled S.C.B medical Public School. I was little nervous as well as frightened but everything went right on that day. Soon time passed on and I got promoted to higher classes and list of my friends increased. I made many friends of both sexes. We all friends had formed a gang. One after another day passed on and I passed each day enjoying every bit of it. By securing good marks in final exams of class – VIII I got promoted to class – IX. I enjoyed every moment during that summer vacation. Our school re-opened and I was filled with excitement about meeting my friends again. That morning my heart was indicating something i.e. some preposterous thing was going to happen. I reached school, met my old friends and at that time I was very happy. My heart was extremely happy and was continuously indicating about something unexpected. My heart was singing, dancing and was behaving as if it has got the important thing it wanted in life. I was not able to get the point but still I was waiting for some miracle on that day.

                                                                                Recess bell rang and I along with my whole gang went to our school canteen and took our respective seats that were nearly reserved for us. My heart started beating faster as if indicating that the happiest moment of my life was very near. Abruptly I heard a beautiful voice which I thought I have some where heard it in my dreams. I was little surprised but was delighted to meet someone of my dream in reality. I found that the voice was coming from my backside.

                                                                                “Excuse me Ambarish. Would you mind including me in your friend’s list as well as in your gang?” These were the most touching words that came out from the mouth of a very beautiful and winsome looking girl named Nisha. I got a little allured towards her. My heart didn’t remain in its normal state but was in the seventh heaven. I felt some sparks in my body. My heart indicated that she was very innocent and was very true from her heart. So I accepted her proposal and included her in our gang. From that day we became close friends and spent most of our time together on telephone or in any parks. We slowly gained faith on each other. We started sharing our secrets without any scepticism. Time passed on, friendship gained momentum and we both got promoted to class – X.

                                                                                Both her parents were working as doctors in Sambalpur. She was living here with her grandparents and her younger sister Rea. We helped each other in every sphere as far as it was possible. As we came closer and closer the bond of our friendship got stronger. I took this friendship as LOVE. I was so much in love with her that I couldn’t even pass any day without talking with her. We used to talk on telephone everyday.

                                                                                Time swiftly passed on and ICSE board exams came to a short distance. “We shouldn’t waste our time on phone as the exams are knocking and we should concentrate on our studies.” This was the most terrible thing I was frightened of hearing. But I had to agree with her keeping stone over my heart. Days were very hard to pass by. It became very difficult for me to concentrate on studies. But I had to concentrate because I didn’t want to destroy the dreams of my parents. So, by God’s wish everything went good and our examination got over. That day I returned home and was waiting for her phone call. That day I was feeling as if I had touched the sky. All of a sudden the telephone started dancing on its toes. Leaving everything, in one breathe I ran towards the dancing phone and picked it up. That familiar voice of Nisha came from the other side. At that moment I felt as if I have got all the things I wanted in my life. Earlier I had decided that I would propose her that day. I talked with her for one and half hours and gained much courage and spoke those golden words “I LOVE YOU NISHA”. The most fortuitous thing happened. She was shocked and got angry to her heart. She shouted at me and to some extent misbehaved me but I didn’t feel bad as I myself had got into hot water. She set her face against my proposal. She kept out the phone from the other side. This was the most sickening mistake that I made on that day. Then I tried to make contacts with her but she never talked with me. I was in a great dilemma. I cursed myself for the blunder. I repented as I myself got out of pocket. Then I thought of another way. I tried to make contacts with her best friend Shruti. She was also one of the members of our gang. Shruti knew all the true love I had for Nisha. I kept the situation as an open book in front of her. She assured me that she would lend a helping hand towards it and would try to seal the broken bond between us. I was little relaxed. During those days time had hung heavy on me. I couldn’t express my sorrow in front of anyone. I became helpless and was feeling very sick and lonely. The joys of my heart were dead. I tried very hard to restore it but failed in every sphere. I felt as if everyone was ignoring me. Life became a hell for me. My heart was crying vigorously. All the attempts made by Shruti failed as Nisha denied discussing anything on that matter with Shruti. At last all my hopes were dashed and I was forced to the dark room of my life. Gradually time passed on with extreme difficulties. I decided to spend my whole life after her. I just wanted to meet her once and beg sorry from her and would try to pick her out of my heart which was a difficult task for me.

                                                                                Then I had to go to meet my father in Delhi with my mom and sis. I stayed there for ten to fifteen days. I was totally disinterested for that trip but was forced by my mom. When I returned the most doleful thing of my life happened. I felt that why was I alive to face this situation. Nisha along with her family had left the place. From different sources I came to know that she had gone to Sambalpur forever. To add to my woes when I tried to make any contact with Shruti I found that she had gone to Kolkata as her father got transferred. I was in such a state that I wanted to die but the thought of my parents was pulling me from my back. I was really frustrated with my life. I was spending my life like an aimless person. Then exam results were out. I scored a good percentage of mark as also she did. Forms were sold from different colleges. I had knowingly submitted a form in Sambalpur University. Why was the Taskmaster rude with me? I wondered over it. After feeling my desolation the great Taskmaster gave some consolation through an intimation letter from Sambalpur University. Then I convinced my parents and got admissions in +2 Science in Sambalpur University. I took admissions there so that I can search her. By that time my heart had become deserted with sorrow, cries and repentance. My search continued. Days after days passed. Many seasons came and went by. Everyone in this world was enjoying whereas I was crying. Nobody was present to share my melancholy state. Happiness of my heart had died long ago. I became a broken-hearted guy. As each day was passing the tree of hope in my heart was getting filled with poison. All the apples were falling out one by one. Somehow I managed to pass out my first year. I was always roving around in search of the reason that what sin I had committed in my last birth for which I am suffering in this birth. I was midway through my final year but I was not able to find any trace of her. Slowly all the apples of the tree had fallen out. Monsoon had arrived.

                                                                                One night I was returning from my coaching class. It was raining heavily. I was passing through a street and was completely wet. All the thoughts about her were revolving around my mind. I was feeling more forlon when instantaneously out of the darkness a car passed by and the moment it crossed me it just stopped. I was flabbergasted and was thrown in panic. As many dreadful thoughts came to my mind that any thieves may come out. Suddenly I was unruffled for a moment. My heart slowly gained its life as a beautiful girl stepped down from the car. After seeing her my heart started dancing like a peacock. Once again new apples came out on the tree. My deserted heart became full of greenery. Happiness again came back to my heart in leaps and bounds as to my utter surprise the girl who stepped out was Nisha!!!!!!! We stood far apart for some minutes. No one was speaking. All the books fell out of my hand. Tears came into my eyes as well as hers. I broke the silence “Forgive me Nisha. I have repented for the mistake……………..” she intervened and spoke “ I should ask for forgiveness as I given so much of pain to you. Sorry for my deeds. I did get every news about you from your best friend Anurag. Later I realized that why didn’t I agree to your proposal. I want forgiveness for the misbehavior I showed to you. At that time I couldn’t decide what was right. I always tried to beg you forgiveness but I didn’t gather enough courage to say so. I also suffered a lot in these years without you. I lived only with your memories. I don’t know if you will get angry or not but I want to say you today that I LOVE YOU AMBARISH”. My joys knew no bounds. I was still befuddled that what I was hearing was real or am I dreaming. She again spoke those beautiful words “I LOVE YOU………………..I LOVE YOU AMBARISH” and I replied to her as “I LOVE YOU TOO NISHA”. At that time I was in such a blithesome mood that I can’t express it. Then we both were locked in each others arm………………………